Have you noticed how computers are getting more and more connections
on them? Maybe if you’re relatively new to the world of computers, you haven’t.
But, for those who have been using PCs since the beginning of time, there’s a
definite difference between those early dinosaurs and their modern cousins. Not
only do we have color monitors and fancy accessories, but the computer
companies are conspiring to get us to buy more of them.
Yes, for those who are into conspiracy theories, this is a
true one. It’s not the government this time, nor is it some secret society it’s
big business that’s conspiring against you and me. Yes, the major computer
manufacturers have gotten together in a secret meeting and decided how to get
into our collective pocket.
Of course, this meeting was so secret that they kept Apple
out of it. The rest of the computer community has never accepted Apple as a
true member anyway, with their different operating system and their trendy
styles. No, Apple’s aren’t real computers, they’re just for kids who want something
that looks cool; or, so say the major manufacturers.
Anyway, the purpose of this ultra-secret computer summit was
how to wrap up more and more of our lives in our computers. Yes, computers are
truly taking over the world, and the computer manufacturers are helping them do
so.
The theory is to make our whole lives center around the
computer. That’s why so much effort has been put into making the computer an
entertainment center, instead of a work center. The first step of the plan was
to make everyone do their work on computers, so that they could control our
work. That tool control of 1/3 of our lives. The current step is to take over
our entertainment. That’ll take care of
the second third of our lives. Then, the final step will be to take over our
sleep, giving the computer control of our whole day.
There are still some technological issues to be worked out
for sleeping on the computer, but you can see the effects of their alpha
testing every day, in workplaces around the world. People sitting in their
cubicles and dozing off at work. Here you thought it was boredom, but it’s all part
of the plan.
“So,” you ask, “what’s in it for the computer companies?
This is a great theory, but where’s the profit?” Aha, that’s the part that’s
been kept the most secret. Yes, all this is ultimately about increasing the
corporate coffers of the computer corporations. You see, as they take over more
and more of our lives, turning us into virtual people, they offer more and more
products to lead us gaily skipping along the path to slavery.
Have you noticed how many connections there are on the back
of your computer these days? Why, early computers might have had half a dozen,
not half a hundred. It’s gotten so crowded back there, that they’re starting to
put connections on the front of the computer as well.
There they sit, dozens upon dozens of connections, just
looking at you, and challenging you to buy enough toys to fill them all. Yes,
that’s what’s going on. They’re trying to get you to buy enough whistles and
bells to connect to your compute, so that you never have to leave your chair. Why,
I’ve heard that they’re getting ready to start offering soft drink dispensers,
right in the computer. That idea was brought about by the super-cooling systems
which are now being offered for power users.
Think of it, if you ever do manage to get enough things to
fill up all those connections on your computer, you won’t be able to move; you’ll
be hemmed into your chair. Especially if you take USB seriously. I mean,
really, who needs a connection that can handle 127 devices anyway?
Don’t say you weren’t warned. When you find your life being
overcome by the computer, remember what you’ve heard. Rise up! Throw off the encumbrance
of the evil computer! Get your life back!
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